Waiter: Sir, would you like to order something?
Me: Ya, could you give me 5 minutes, i'm actually waiting for someone.
Waiter: Sure sir! (leaves)
Lady : Excuse me, siddharth?
Me: Yes, annapurna?
Lady : Yes...
Me: Oh sit, sit...
Annapurna: thanks, i'm sorry i'm just a little late, couldn't find the restaurant at first.
Me: But you said you've been here before, didn't you?
Her: Yes, but i said that to avoid embarassment, hehehe...
Me: hahahaha...that's ok! Excuse me dinesh..... dinesh....
Waiter: Yes sir?
Me: Yes now we can order,give me the menu card please!
Waiter : Sure sir, here you go..
Me : Annapurna, will you like a drink?
Her: ummm.. what are you having?
Me: LIT
Her: what's that?
Me: A long island ice tea.
Her: oh, i'm pretty bad at abbreviations, i will also have that ice tea
Me: No, but its called an ice tea, its actually a cocktail, with a mixture of quite a few liquors.
Waiter : (interrupting) Sir, please take your time, call me when you've decided.
Me: yeah alright....(to annapurna) these waiters these days are more occupied than the indian football team!
Her: How do you know his name?
Me: He has it written on his vest coat, there's a small badge, a nameplate kind of a thing. i don't like people whistling or making kissing sounds to call waiters, so i make it a point to know their names, if they don't have a badge that is. Anyway, ya so LIT is a cocktail. You will have a normal ice tea or some juice?
Her: ok, i will have ummm..one IT
Me: hahahaha, ok! Dinesh.... (to waiter) one long island ice tea for me and one just plain ice tea for the lady.
Waiter: yes sir!(leaves)
Me: so annapurna, what else has to be revealed about us besides what we've written on shaadi.com ?
Her: A lot actually. But i don't think it will happen in one evening. Now that we've met, we can do this often and slowly we shall have a fair idea of what we are getting into.
Me: True, i like your directness.
Waiter: Your drink sir, your drink ma'am! (leaves)
Me: Cheers!
Her: Cheers!
Me: Annu, i'm planning a 3 day vaccation with friends to kerala. i wanted to ask you whether you are keen on joining us, as in joining me?
Her: Listen sidd, if i do that, then it would mean that we are dating, and are taking this forward!
Me: Arent we?
Her : i dont think we are dating, i mean common u'vnt even proposed me.
Me : oh do i need to? why are we here? i thought this was mutual, we dont need to ask each other out and stuff, becuse we met through shaadi.com, the whole purpose of our meeting each other was to hook up!
Her: And who told you we have? i told you the very first time i met you that it will take time.
Me: So you need more time?
Her: Naturally!
Me: Its not very natural. Girls usually dont take so much time to like me.
Her: Oh really? that's why you needed a Shaadi.com to look for a partner?
Me: Shaadi.com was not my need, it was just greed.
Her : Ok relax and breathe.
Ok, now dont frown....sidd? you once said you liked my directness, now why are you so irritated?
Me : hello? annu? why weren't you picking up?
Her: I was cooking yaar,tell me!
Me: Annu, i love you!
Her: Ok.
Me: what ok? do u too?
Her: Ya i love myself too.
Me: Common yaar, you know what i mean!
Her: Yes i do
Me: what? you love me???
Her: No Sidd, i said yes i do know what you mean.
Me: so you don't love me?
Her: Sidd, i love you as a friend!
Me: Now what the fuck is that supposed to mean?
Her: Sidd, chill. it means you're a friend, not more than that! and i love you like that.
Me: Now what do i do with that?
Her: You can't do anything about it Sidd, you just have to let it be. Anyway, i'll call you back some time, i need to get back to the kitchen, bye , cya!
Her: listen sidd, i need to tell you something
Me: Yeah, go ahead.
Her: There's this guy i met last week through Shaadi.com, called Shomik.
(pause)
Her: (continues) We like each other.
Me: Ok, that was quick, how come you took so much time with me?
Her: Sidd, it has to be natural, you don't need equal amount of time to fall in love with everyone!
Me: love? you just said like?
Her: You are making it difficult now, we tried our best and it didn't work out. So we need to move on, me, you, both.
Me: but i dont want to move on, i'm in love with you, i was waiting for you for so long to reach where i've reached.
Her: that's the point sidd, i couldn't, and i can't discuss this further. I've found a great friend in you. i really expect you to understand.
Me: i'll try (leaves)
Her : Sidd.....Sidd...
Her: hello? Sidd are you alright? you havn't called me or replied to any of my texts since the last time we met?
Me: yes, you wanted me to move on, this was my way. I cant speak to you all the time and move on simultaneously.
Her: Look Sidd, i'm sorry,
Me: Just give me some time Annu, please!
Her: Alright, bye, take care.
Me: Ya you too, Bye!
Me : (to a lady) Excuse me...???
Lady: Yes (turns).....
(pause)
Lady : Siddharth..
Me : Yes, i recognised you from the escalators. How are you doing annapurna?
Her: Oh it is such a pleasant surprise!
Me: Ya it is, let's have coffee?
Her: Where have you been?
Me: Well, lots of places actually..
Her: like?
Me: delhi, bangalore, vizag...
Her: doing what?
Me: I kept getting transferred... what about you? how is Shomik? Heard you guys got married soon after you guys met.
Her: Yes, but now we are not together.
Me: as in? you guys are divorced?
Her: Ya, we got it done a couple of months back.
Me: Can i ask you the reason?
Her: Sure. i dont know how to put it. Shomik had a wide friend circle, and posh! They had parties every weekend, where alcohol and marijuana was consumed without hesitation. Inevitably at the end of every party, shomik would be out, like extremely intoxicated. Once, during such a party, he passed out, and i had to drive back home. He seemed to take it very casually when i told him this the next day. It didn't go very well with me. So to take a stand, i refused to go with him the next time. As usual, he got terribly high till the party got over. He was driving back home, when the cops caught him. He was arrested for a day and then released. We also had to heavily bribe the cops, or else he could've been behind bars for a lot many days. But he didn't stop. In the next three years, he repeated the incident nearly 5 times, and got away by heavy bribing. I just one day refused to stay with a criminal !
Me: You guys have any kids?
Her: No, and thank God for that!
Me: hello, Annu? are you there?
Her: Yes, tell me?
Me: Listen, Annu, you have 5 minutes?
Her: Yes, what's the matter?
Me: ok, cool. i just wanted to ask, you are single right?
Her: Yes Sidd, i thought you knew that, why all of a sudden?
Me: I want to propose you again Annu, i've not been able to move over you, i guess its very apparent as well. And now that you are through with the shomik shit and all, can we get together now? which i think we should have a long time back?
Her: Sidd, i really respect this from you, but i've just come out of a horrid association wid my ex-husband. I need some more time.
Me: Ya, could you give me 5 minutes, i'm actually waiting for someone.
Waiter: Sure sir! (leaves)
(In a while)
Lady : Excuse me, siddharth?
Me: Yes, annapurna?
Lady : Yes...
Me: Oh sit, sit...
Annapurna: thanks, i'm sorry i'm just a little late, couldn't find the restaurant at first.
Me: But you said you've been here before, didn't you?
Her: Yes, but i said that to avoid embarassment, hehehe...
Me: hahahaha...that's ok! Excuse me dinesh..... dinesh....
Waiter: Yes sir?
Me: Yes now we can order,give me the menu card please!
Waiter : Sure sir, here you go..
Me : Annapurna, will you like a drink?
Her: ummm.. what are you having?
Me: LIT
Her: what's that?
Me: A long island ice tea.
Her: oh, i'm pretty bad at abbreviations, i will also have that ice tea
Me: No, but its called an ice tea, its actually a cocktail, with a mixture of quite a few liquors.
Waiter : (interrupting) Sir, please take your time, call me when you've decided.
Me: yeah alright....(to annapurna) these waiters these days are more occupied than the indian football team!
Her: How do you know his name?
Me: He has it written on his vest coat, there's a small badge, a nameplate kind of a thing. i don't like people whistling or making kissing sounds to call waiters, so i make it a point to know their names, if they don't have a badge that is. Anyway, ya so LIT is a cocktail. You will have a normal ice tea or some juice?
Her: ok, i will have ummm..one IT
Me: hahahaha, ok! Dinesh.... (to waiter) one long island ice tea for me and one just plain ice tea for the lady.
Waiter: yes sir!(leaves)
Me: so annapurna, what else has to be revealed about us besides what we've written on shaadi.com ?
Her: A lot actually. But i don't think it will happen in one evening. Now that we've met, we can do this often and slowly we shall have a fair idea of what we are getting into.
Me: True, i like your directness.
Waiter: Your drink sir, your drink ma'am! (leaves)
Me: Cheers!
Her: Cheers!
(After 4 months)
Me: Annu, i'm planning a 3 day vaccation with friends to kerala. i wanted to ask you whether you are keen on joining us, as in joining me?
Her: Listen sidd, if i do that, then it would mean that we are dating, and are taking this forward!
Me: Arent we?
Her : i dont think we are dating, i mean common u'vnt even proposed me.
Me : oh do i need to? why are we here? i thought this was mutual, we dont need to ask each other out and stuff, becuse we met through shaadi.com, the whole purpose of our meeting each other was to hook up!
Her: And who told you we have? i told you the very first time i met you that it will take time.
Me: So you need more time?
Her: Naturally!
Me: Its not very natural. Girls usually dont take so much time to like me.
Her: Oh really? that's why you needed a Shaadi.com to look for a partner?
Me: Shaadi.com was not my need, it was just greed.
Her : Ok relax and breathe.
Ok, now dont frown....sidd? you once said you liked my directness, now why are you so irritated?
( 1 week later, on phone)
Me : hello? annu? why weren't you picking up?
Her: I was cooking yaar,tell me!
Me: Annu, i love you!
Her: Ok.
Me: what ok? do u too?
Her: Ya i love myself too.
Me: Common yaar, you know what i mean!
Her: Yes i do
Me: what? you love me???
Her: No Sidd, i said yes i do know what you mean.
Me: so you don't love me?
Her: Sidd, i love you as a friend!
Me: Now what the fuck is that supposed to mean?
Her: Sidd, chill. it means you're a friend, not more than that! and i love you like that.
Me: Now what do i do with that?
Her: You can't do anything about it Sidd, you just have to let it be. Anyway, i'll call you back some time, i need to get back to the kitchen, bye , cya!
( After 2 months)
Her: listen sidd, i need to tell you something
Me: Yeah, go ahead.
Her: There's this guy i met last week through Shaadi.com, called Shomik.
(pause)
Her: (continues) We like each other.
Me: Ok, that was quick, how come you took so much time with me?
Her: Sidd, it has to be natural, you don't need equal amount of time to fall in love with everyone!
Me: love? you just said like?
Her: You are making it difficult now, we tried our best and it didn't work out. So we need to move on, me, you, both.
Me: but i dont want to move on, i'm in love with you, i was waiting for you for so long to reach where i've reached.
Her: that's the point sidd, i couldn't, and i can't discuss this further. I've found a great friend in you. i really expect you to understand.
Me: i'll try (leaves)
Her : Sidd.....Sidd...
( After 2 weeks, on phone)
Her: hello? Sidd are you alright? you havn't called me or replied to any of my texts since the last time we met?
Me: yes, you wanted me to move on, this was my way. I cant speak to you all the time and move on simultaneously.
Her: Look Sidd, i'm sorry,
Me: Just give me some time Annu, please!
Her: Alright, bye, take care.
Me: Ya you too, Bye!
( After 4 years,in a shopping mall)
Me : (to a lady) Excuse me...???
Lady: Yes (turns).....
(pause)
Lady : Siddharth..
Me : Yes, i recognised you from the escalators. How are you doing annapurna?
Her: Oh it is such a pleasant surprise!
Me: Ya it is, let's have coffee?
( Coffee shop)
Her: Where have you been?
Me: Well, lots of places actually..
Her: like?
Me: delhi, bangalore, vizag...
Her: doing what?
Me: I kept getting transferred... what about you? how is Shomik? Heard you guys got married soon after you guys met.
Her: Yes, but now we are not together.
Me: as in? you guys are divorced?
Her: Ya, we got it done a couple of months back.
Me: Can i ask you the reason?
Her: Sure. i dont know how to put it. Shomik had a wide friend circle, and posh! They had parties every weekend, where alcohol and marijuana was consumed without hesitation. Inevitably at the end of every party, shomik would be out, like extremely intoxicated. Once, during such a party, he passed out, and i had to drive back home. He seemed to take it very casually when i told him this the next day. It didn't go very well with me. So to take a stand, i refused to go with him the next time. As usual, he got terribly high till the party got over. He was driving back home, when the cops caught him. He was arrested for a day and then released. We also had to heavily bribe the cops, or else he could've been behind bars for a lot many days. But he didn't stop. In the next three years, he repeated the incident nearly 5 times, and got away by heavy bribing. I just one day refused to stay with a criminal !
Me: You guys have any kids?
Her: No, and thank God for that!
( After 3 months,on phone)
Me: hello, Annu? are you there?
Her: Yes, tell me?
Me: Listen, Annu, you have 5 minutes?
Her: Yes, what's the matter?
Me: ok, cool. i just wanted to ask, you are single right?
Her: Yes Sidd, i thought you knew that, why all of a sudden?
Me: I want to propose you again Annu, i've not been able to move over you, i guess its very apparent as well. And now that you are through with the shomik shit and all, can we get together now? which i think we should have a long time back?
Her: Sidd, i really respect this from you, but i've just come out of a horrid association wid my ex-husband. I need some more time.
awesome story... a typical girl problem.. Or I should say typical relationship problem... Loved reading after so many days, or months i should say..
ReplyDeletereally well put yaar...seemed like a Nora Ephron movie at some places, except of course at the end...feel really bad for "Me". The quintessential Ritwik ironic quirk was well placed too...neway,to understand and analyze it better....i guess...i need some more time :)
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